Sweetest Husband Ever!

So the house is pretty lonely when I get home from school and I often dislike returning there as I am afraid that the bugs will all come out at once and carry me off to their secret colony in the spare bathroom that we never go in. Seriously I guarantee there is at least one cockroach in the sink as we speak, I NEVER go in there alone, gross. Anyway what really brightens my lonely day is when my husband leaves me sweet little notes around the house. Actually I am impressed with his creativity. He uses whatever is around, foam shapes, chocolate chips, nerds, ya know the basic stuff! I love him and am so grateful that I don't have to spend this summer without him as well. We heard an interesting thing on the radio a few days ago a lady had written in saying that although loosing a child would be extremely difficult she would rather that then loosing her spouse. The people calling in were really offended by the story and to them she was a terrible mother because obviously as a mother loosing a child would be the most devastating thing that could happen. Justice and I didn't see it so cut and dry. Yes as a mother I would hate to loose my children, I love them so much and these past few weeks without them have been very lonely and depressing but at the same time Justice has been there to help me through it with support, love and understanding that only he can give.  I am not going to say which I would rather loose my husband or my children because I can't make that decision and apiece of me would die either way. I wonder if it was so cut and dry for the people on the radio because they feel and a marriage is expendable, that if you loose a spouse you just find another one, many people are already willing to throw theirs away while they are still living what would be the big deal. 

I know this is kind of a weird thought but I just thought that I would throw it out there and make an emphasis on how I feel that many times in our lives with children we get so busy taking care of our children that we forget to focus on the marriage relationship that started the whole thing. Your spouse is who you covenanted with. That is the base unit to which children are wonderful appendages to. Being "childless" again has been an interesting experience for our marriage, we are sure now that neither of us want to return to those days with out our beautiful babies.

Sometimes in the thick of a crazy day filled with diapers, crying, cleaning, and exhaustion I would think how much easier our lives were before we had kids, how we used to always hold hands and look goofily into each others eyes, stay up all night, go where ever we wanted to go whenever we wanted to,  and while this may be true I can now say with confidence that I would not change my choice to have children for anything in the world. Although we aren't as able to have the honeymoon relationship we once had our love has grown and matured in a way that I don't know that it would have if we had chosen other things.

And with a loss of either one there is the knowledge that this is not the end, we have made covenants with a loving Heavenly Father and our family will be together forever. I think the real key here is family and keeping it together as a strength to each of its members.

Sorry, this post was really just supposed to be those pictures and say how much I appreciate my husband but then I kind of got off on a tangent I have a lot of time to think these days!

I love you all